sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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