she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
