i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
