i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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