Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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