You really coming over, don't trick.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
