He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
How does one acquire holy water?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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