why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
third nipple confirmed
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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