she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize
