hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
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