plz talk dirty to me
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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