More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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