Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
