thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
