What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
