Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
