Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
