In the future we'll all be gay
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
