Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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