Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
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