Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
