like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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