My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Randomize
