Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
FUCK WHALES
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
