my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
