am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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