I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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