Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
