Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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