What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
