throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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