NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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