Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
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