S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
