Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
