the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
