That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
