Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
