woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize