So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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