no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
