HIV tests are more positive than that guy
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize