Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
