What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
