She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
