No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
