How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
