what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
