I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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