id be glad to
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
